All the News That Isn’t

Not saying it’s hot, but it’s the first time there’s been a cactus on my weather widget.
Not global warming, it’s global damn hot.
Known around here as Dear Jesus heat.
In All the News That Isn’t . . .
What about that Affordable Care, huh? If they called it that instead of Obamacare would’ve spared us a lot of tumult.
After all, Obama does not come around to your bed with a stethoscope and chart. Not Barrack Welby.
Republicans sure have been good losers, though. Going around pulling out IV’s and feeding tubes. “Ain’t payin’ for this!”
But they can scream all they want, I’m smiling all the way to the urologist. That’s because I don’t know what a urologist does.
Just a question of which pre-existing condition to go with. After all, they all are.
You knew a Supreme Court with at least 3 colostomy bags under-robe was not going to let us down.
Actually, it was the guys with the bags who were against it. Counter-intuitive.
What a day. I get to buy health insurance and keep the medals I got at the Army-Navy store. Thank you Supreme Court!
Republican reaction was not muted—
Romney vows to fight for affordable sickness.
Mitch McConnell is against it because he has a private supply of monkey glands.
A teary John Boehner burned his Blue Cross /Blue Shield card on the floor of the House.
Sarah Palin condemned it since she’s all done with her elective surgery.
In the not so affordable news:
Not clear if the stowaways on the New Jersey ship were trying to get in or get out.
President Obama not blamed for dropping gas prices.
Been discovered that the Romney bus is registered to Mumbai Transit.
Katie Holmes decides not to take on this impossible mission, Tom Cruise marriage self-destructs in 30 seconds.
Home prices going up which is good unless you’re trying to hold one down.
The college BCS championship series is out; we’ll just let the talking heads and ex-players slug it out for the title.
Electronic cigarettes implicated in cancer of microchip.
There’s an iPhone app for suing Samsung.
Democrats tap Justin Bieber to open convention in hopes of drawing a crowd.
John Roberts having trouble getting a foursome.
President of Egypt and 100 piastres gets you a ride on a camel.
And, here in Wisconsin, Governor Walker will not implement Affordable Care since he’s covered under the Koch brothers Blue Cross/Blue Shield. They take him as a deduction on their taxes . . .

That’s All the News That Isn’t . . .

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