Archive for June 2012

All the News That Isn’t for June 25

June 25, 2012

6-25-12

Mitt Luthor meets with Legion of Doom in secret hideaway in Utah.

A ritual selection of vice-president, a virgin sacrificed, and they’re out of there. After slaying the servants, of course, who might have witnessed the proceedings. The job pays good, but . . .

Congress contempt charge lands on desk of Attorney General Holder, who drags self out by collar with gun to head saying “Get back–or the brother gets it!”

God particle found and, boy, is it mad.

Commerce secretary seizes moment and retires.

Tumbling shares reduce housewares retailer to Bed, Bath, and That’s About It.

Germany’s Angela Merkel looking a lot tenser without George W to rub her neck.

Couple freed by Somali pirates after they just couldn’t take them for another minute.

Microsoft tablet unearthed–it’s clay and uses the cuneiform operating system.

Attempting to widen the flock, Southern Baptists change name to NASCAR Baptists.

Fewer people paying attention to ADHD.

I use my ADHD discount all the time.

Michigan authorities go door to door looking for vaginas.

In Michigan, the female parts may only be referred to as paw paws.

War on women down to the war on you-know-what down there.

Standard model of universe flawed, replaced with Kohler model.

Moderate drinking during pregnancy not only OK but just about essential.

President Obama misses 4,006 free throws in a row on White House court.

Janet Jackson’s breast gets OK 10 years too late.

Romney to replace health care with wealth care.
And food stamps with Wawa’s hoagies gift cards.

The Obama edict stopping immigrant child deportation actually a big relief to Mitt Romney, son of a Mexican father.

Typical American family of 4 now includes at least 1 Asian. Plus 1 Latino and a kid with curly hair and glasses who’s bright but a smart ass.

Web site Politico fires blogger for not realizing Romney is not comfortable around white folks, either.

Roger Clemens covers his butt, and

Here in Wisconsin, voters must decide if Ron Johnson and Tommy Thompson from Wisconsin is just too cute . . .

. . . That’s All the News That Isn’t . . .

I was at wawas

June 20, 2012

I was at wawasI was at wawas

mitts wawa moment

June 20, 2012

<a href=’https://mefeld.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/i-was-at-wawas.mp3′>I was at wawas

Anyone Seen My Slippers

June 13, 2012

Anyone Seen My Slippers

All the News That Isn’t for June 4, 2012

June 4, 2012

6-4-12

Her majesty’s been a pretty nice girl for 60 years now. That’s from Frankie Laine to Justin Bieber.

Elizabeth’s been on the throne longer than Prince Albert’s been in the can.

Poor Phillip knocking on the door the whole time–the only other one’s in the tower.

60 years is a long haul but not even 7 in corgi years.

The Green Lantern comes out as gay while Superman stays in the closet. Well, he’s changing. All this time it’s been Jimmie Olson and not Lois Lane.

Great Caesar’s ghost.

Batman and Robin just never made a big deal about it.

President Obama admits he smoked pot but says he didn’t exhale.

Romney still won’t fess up to drinking Robitussin in Salt Lake City.

Trump says Romany born in Windsor, Ontario, not Detroit. Election thrown into disarray.

Romney iPad app misspells the country as Amormica.

Amercia is actually a Romney holding company.

Amercia is that yoghurt Jamie Lee Curtis needs to stay regular.

Michelle Obama has a new gardening book: 50 Shades of Kale.

Canada expels Syrian diplomats; conflict ends.

Romney blames Obama for Zombie attacks and heartbreak of psoriasis.

Veterans back Romney for keeping 5 sons out of military.

Spanish economic armada sinks in harbor.

SpaceX business dragon capsule splashes down, writes off cost of entire trip.

Appeals court rules there is no defense for marriage.

New Obama ads concentrate on Romney’s Messachusetts.

Bill Clinton defends Romney’s practices because they have stripped many of the same assets.

The way things are going has the President back up to a pack a day. And it might be something stronger.

As bad as the economy is it still out earns bank interest.

Borgiagate at the Vatican.

The Butler released receipts for the Pope’s high end casual wear.

Planned Parenthood says Mitt was not.
And the Romneys are 0 for 5 with the boys.

President Obama says he will return terrorist kill selection to the appropriate GS-12 in the state department.

Tomato genome sequenced–turns out tomatoes are more complex genetically than people, which is why you never see a BLP.

President Obama has been secretly attacking Iranian computers with Angry Birds Tehran.

Windows puts what you had for breakfast and what you discharged on the home screen.

Being John Edwards pretty bad but not a federal crime.

Nancy Reagan endorses John Edwards. Don’t know how that guy does it.

Here in Wisconsin, Walker forces are prepared to burn the Reichstag if he loses the recall.

There have been a few setbacks for the governor–

–The Walker iPad app misspelled the state as Wisconman
–Ironically Walker appeared in the Milwaukee crime statistics he’s been complaining about
–The Beloit billionaire supporter paid no state taxes, but, come on, a billionaire in Beloit has suffered enough
–The Walker claim that the 30 million raised in $3 donations from 10 million Wisconsinites is about 4 million more then there are. Same guys who did the jobs figures
–The 35, 775 new jobs claimed by Walker just happens to be the population of Beloit . . .

. . . That’s All the News That Isn’t . . .